Lately I have time to think about my journey to lose weight and I have not been that happy with my progress. I have thought about what I want to accomplish and the effort that I have expended and I have realized there is not enough effort being put in to meet the goal. Further more I pretend to myself in a quiet way that I am doing all the necessary things. This past week and leading up to it I have realized more clearly that I am not being honest with myself. I am not honest about what I am eating and drinking and I am not honest about what I am doing for working out. I am not making up stories about doing things that I have done or not done, it's not that kind of dishonesty. It's the kind of dishonesty to oneself when you fool yourself into thinking all is well, "it's OK if I eat this fast food, I can eat this because it really doesn't make that much difference" or "if I don't work out for 4 days, I'll catch up later". Small, little lies to oneself with over indulgences and bad choices. Giving into the moment instead of seeing the big picture and then doing it over and over until it is a habit. I don't expect to be perfect and I know things take time but a pattern of "fooling myself" or not being honest with myself is getting tired and it is getting me nowhere.
So, the first step is to recognize the problem. Check. Now to fix the problem. I need to be honest with myself. Honest about what I eat and drink and how it affects my health. I also need to be honest with putting the work in to do the exercise because I need exercise to make me healthy. Full Stop.
I have to be careful not to get too down on myself because that really doesn't get a person anywhere. But I was feeling down already knowing deep down I was outwardly wanting something and then inwardly doing all the wrong things to get there. That is not a good feeling. So I do take comfort in making a conscious decision to align my actions to my goals. There will be ups and downs in getting to where I want to go but that is normal and to be expected. I will move forward with honesty and integrity and that way I can really say I am doing my best and that is all one can really do is try and live their best life.
My friday portrait on a monday.
Morning lights.
Have a great day everyone.
